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3.19 Expression - Ideas 3: Staying Attuned

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The Arts and Science of Relationships: Understanding Human Needs

University of Toronto

4.4 (182 ratings) | 26K Students Enrolled

This course provides an introduction to: 1. Basic concepts of The Strategies and Skills Learning and Development System (SSLD), their relevance for every day relationships and provide advanced concepts for participants who work in fields of social work and health care . 2. Basic practice principles and methods of SSLD, illustrated by relationship management case studies. 3. The SSLD framework for relationship management assessment; N3C (needs, circumstances, characteristics, capacity) and problem translation. 4. Core competencies in the relationship management application of the SSLD system: Observation learning, simulation, real life implementation, review and monitoring.

Skills You'll Learn

Psychology, Assertiveness, Communication, Building Relationships

Reviews

4.4 (182 ratings)

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AD

Feb 05, 2018

I only just started this course, but I feel like I'm learning a lot about relationships, needs vs. wants, etc. I just started, but I highly recommend it anyways!

JN

Jun 01, 2019

The course is a good one, it brought to light the principle of SSLD, the need for self-awareness using N3C and the negative and positive aspect of social script.

From the lesson

Module 3 - Communication

This module covers topics on how to build and manage your relationships through effective communication skills such as listening, understanding, reception, and expression.

Reception to Expression0:38

3.16 Expression: Facts6:21

3.17 Expression - Ideas 1: Matching N3C1:58

3.18 Expression - Ideas 2: Technical Tips4:07

3.19 Expression - Ideas 3: Staying Attuned4:00

3.20 Expression - Emotions 1: Experience, Expression and Feedback3:31

3.21 Expression - Emotions 2: Regulations3:33

3.22 Expression - Emotions 3: Emotional Work2:13

3.23 Expression - Needs7:13

Taught By

A. Ka Tat Tsang
Founder of the SSLD System; Professor and Factor-Inwentash Chair in Social Work in the Global Community

Transcript

I think being attuned to your audience or the other parties

is so important and then I guess how can you tell if the metaphor you're using, for

instance, they're understanding it and they're accepting your idea.

>> Well, you have already given the key word.

The key word is to stay attuned.

And how do we do that?

In SSLD, we're looking for specific behavioural markers

when people can extend on your metaphor,

>> Mm-hm.

>> That means they have got the idea, or they can elaborate on it, or

they can give you similar examples.

After, say for example, you have worked

with 12-year-olds, with an apple, and

then you bring in something else now and ask them, what is this ?

If they can tell you a different way of classification,

then you know that they have got the idea.

Say for example, after you've taken in the apple,

and then you say you are bringing a cat and ask people, what is this?

It's a cat, what is a cat?

And then people can say well, it's an animal or it's a pet.

And then you can ask, so can the cat be something else?

And if they can answer,

if someone can tell you,

the cat can actually be a guide,

be a therapist, or the cat can be a teacher,

or the cat can be part of your decor.

The cat can be your message to your customer about how this space is

an animal friendly space.

Then you know that these students are getting the idea.

So you stay attuned, you're looking for extension of your idea or

specific application of it, elaboration.

And sometimes, especially in the pedagogical or educational setting,

you can actually ask people.

What is the idea that you have got?

This skill of clarification actually works both ways, and

this is something that we encourage in communication.

Sometimes you would just say to the other person that I just do not want to

misunderstand you, so I'm going to tell you what I've heard from you

is that what you are saying to me. That it's like seeking clarification and

confirmation.

Sometimes you can be doing the same.

Yeah, I just want to make sure that we're on the same page,

I have talked about this, can you tell me what does that mean to you?

Does it make sense or because we don't want to be asking this

question that can be taken as questioning or sometimes can be,

some people can take it as humiliating question,

you're thinking I don't understand you or I'm not following.

Instead of, do you understand?

or repeat to me what I have told you,

this is sort of a more didactic top down approach, we would be asking

what do you think of it?

Does it make sense to you?

How does it make sense to you?

Or sometimes to make the other party feel better,

I've told you, do you see something wrong with this or

what aspect of it you like better?

So, you can be asking questions like that to get direct feedback from the other

person.

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