[MUSIC] Right now we want to talk about the cause of conflict. When you think of moments where you get frustrated, where you might even exhibit some anger, where you might have an increase in the way you're communicating, a more forward communication style, you're really choosing your style, your personal style based on a situation. So when your personal style is elevated or exasperated or exaggerated because of conflict, you have to really check yourself. Because how you respond to conflict is really more important than the conflict itself. So in order for you to stay your responses, you have to really be able to recognize when it's taking place, so let's review a little bit more about the causes of conflict. One of the things that we talk about earlier was the conflict can be positive. Then conflict can be, it can also be negative. So, when you are course of conflict the most important one is communication. Now, your communication style, the way you present your style communicating with others can cause someone to react in a very aggressive or assertive way, which can stimulate a conflict situation. It can also be a breakdown of communication. It could be a lack of understanding of what an individual is saying. So what I encourage you to do is to be responsible for your own personal style of communicating. Make sure you listen to understand, and make sure that you choose your behavior in response correctly as well. Some people have been in situations where they have seen individuals, when a dialogue is taking place, become defensive. Well, that is a response to a conflict situation caused by communication breakdown. So whether you're sending a message or receiving a message, make sure that your style of communication is appropriate to ensure that conflict is manageable. Another cause of conflict is leadership or the lack of leadership. If you don't have strong leadership or you feel like your leadership is not responsive to the positions you feel you have In the work environment it causes conflict. Because what ends up happening is further dialog between team members, or peers, or management about how dysfunctional you feel the leadership is. How they are not responsive to your personal needs, or how you feel that they are not directing the team in a transactional or transformational manner. So when you're thinking about your leadership, make sure you remember that they're people too and they also need to learn how to manage through constructive situations and manage their conflict appropriate. So don't be so judgmental of your leadership and sometimes recognize that they're just trying to do the best that they can with the resources that they have as well. Understanding that and knowing that can help you manage a situation in conflict with leadership. Another area to talk about is when your performance expectations aren't as clear as you need them to be In order for you to feel that you can perform at your highest level. So your leader or manager, or the person that is providing you the direction, may feel that they're being very clear. They may feel that they're sending the message to you, so you should be able to perform at your highest level. If you can't or you aren't, or you're not clear then it's your responsibility to seek for that clarification. So conflict will continue to exist if you don't communicate your needs, and you don't seek for clarification with your management team. So, be responsible in that situation and ask. Simply extending your hand for clarification can control the conflict that might otherwise continue to exist if you do not take that step. What happens when you have a conflict situation that goes unresolved is low productivity. Because individuals just become fragmented. They can't follow directions. And their mind and mine, I share thoughts, I should say are full of the things that are going wrong in a situation, so they are not just performing at their highest level. When we are talking about conflict and you are talking about being in a situation where it is affecting your productivity, what I encourage you to do is remind yourself that you are responsible for your behavior. Even with the given circumstances, you are the one that is going to either drive yourself to a higher performance to eradicate the low productivity. You can seek for clarification to stimulate a higher level of performance on your own. Don't think that everybody is responsible for your behavior. In a conflict situation take the responsibility to ensure your level of performance won't stay low but increase to a higher level of performance. Now another one that is very common in the work environment actually in life is change, anything that takes place in a work environment or personal life that moves you from one area to the other, can cause conflict. So let's talk about something on a personal level first. You move, it takes you a long time to get settled into a new environment, and not inability to feel safe to know where your items are, to know where your toothbrush is, to know where your clothes are. Whatever that might be, lead to the path that you are looking for all causes conflict that stimulates a negative emotion that can be very conflict motivated if you don't choose to manage it. In work environment change can be as simple as moving from one desk station to another. From moving from a cubicle to an office or an office to a cube, or it could be a new team member is being brought onto the team. Any type of change as small as it is can cause a conflict situation. Being aware of that and being responsible for your own style of responding to that type of change, is the way and the use to get resolution on conflict. Be aware that these things in your life can cause conflict. And you're responsible for that conflict at that point in time. So, unresolved conflict. Anything that's gone left unattended, let's say it that way. So, if something really upsets you, address it. As well as really sorting through your own reaction to it. Is it really as big of a deal as you're making it out to be? Or are you just allowing yourself to be more aggressive about the situation at hand? So I know I hear a lot in the work environment, they don't even say hello to me. Well then, don't expect them to say hello to you. If you want to engage with a person, that particular individual, then you say a hello to them. Taking action to resolve an issue is the most important thing you can do in a conflict situation. Remember to be professional, remember to be calm, and choose your words wisely because you're really part of the situation if you feel. That the conflict is unresolved. Be the change agent and resolve a conflict. An additional one that is also something that is not quite obvious to us, but we might have it present itself in different ways. For example, you might feel the muscles in your neck are a little tense. You might find that you're not as comfortable in a situation. Headaches might present themselves. You might be sleepy, or just not willing or wanting to deal with a situation. And the magic word is called stress, so any of the things that we just discussed with respect to conflict, whether it be the items that we reviewed in any of the modules. But this one particular is unresolved conflict, communication, your inability to resolve conflict can ultimately cause stress. So, to minimizing stress can be as simple as acknowledging the situations that are bringing the stress to you. Be responsible for it, because one of the biggest things I see in the workplace is people rejecting their responsibility for the situation that they are in. Which ultimately, if gone unresolved, will present itself in a physical form that will cause stress. [SOUND]
