The ideal self is centered on autonomous motivation: what a person wants to do, and results in sustained, desired change. Conversely, the ought self is based on controlled motivation: what a person feels they must do based on the standards of others. The ideal self comprises hope, core identity, and an image of a desired future, and is fueled by optimism and self-efficacy. We then turn to the two forms of empathy: empathy with the head (a form of conceptual understanding and cognitive processing which implicates both the TPN and DMN) and empathy with the heart (genuine emphatic concern, which engages the DMN alone); with our focus on the need to develop emotional self-awareness in order to serve others, while appropriately balancing both forms of empathy as the coaching situation demands. Lastly, we explore the notion of genuine listening in a coaching relationship (as opposed to mere 'hearing' the other person speak), and outline a case for "listening beyond the words": giving our full attention to the other person to establish what lies beyond the words, and what meaning we can derive from what that other person is saying.